A man was driving five penguins across the Croatian-Serbian border. He was a penguin smuggler.

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Q: Why didn't the boy go to school? A: It was the weekend.

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hey

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because the burglars tied her up and gagged her before they robbed the house and she couldn't do anything until one of the neighbors found her and untied her.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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A woman is walking down the street. A midget approaches her and with his keen sense of smell, informs the tall woman of her delicious scent and says, "Ma'am your hair smells lovely, may I please take a closer sniff?" Then woman obliges and the midget is arrested for alleged rape, or as he put it, trying to sniff her vagina.

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a chicken crosses the street to ask a man: what is an anti-joke? the man replies: a joke the chicken responds: so why do they call it an ANTI-joke? the man answers: why did the horse walk into a bar? the chicken retorts: you can't answer a question with a question! the man replies: you're a figment of my imagination, nah nah nah nah i can't hear you.

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How do you starve a celebrity? Tell them they're fat.

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Why did the black man not tip his waiter? Because she provided terrible service and was undeserving.

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Whats worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm? Biting into your dog and finding a worm.

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What's green and has wheels? A green car.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Dr. Dr who? Dr Johnson. I'm afraid you have AIDS.

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Sometimes I hope into bed and pretend I'm a carrot!!!!

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whats da difference between a black people and grass. there both black except for the grass.

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Q: why did a sanke have a rattle A: it was born wiith it

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Why did the black man buy a watermelon? To eat it of course

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Q. What's worse than 400 babies going down the road at 80 miles per hours in a garbage truck? A. The same babies being dumped into a trash compactor

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I'm going to Re-write History... History

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What did God say to Noah? "Hi."

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"Knock Knock!" "Who's Their?" "Mew" "Mew Who?" "Mew Two Stupid! Get yo Pokemon FACTS Right!" "Mew Two Proceeds to walk away in distress"

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What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed Nothing it is a sentient object and doesn't have the capability to talk

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What do you call a man wearing a costume similar to a stereotypical ghost? A mentally disabled man on halloween.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. So was my son after I beat him to death.

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A Boy went up to his dad and told him he was hungry. His dad then beat him to death.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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