A mormon walks into a bar. He orders a caffeine free Coke.

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I was going to tell my mom an anti-joke. Then she died.

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Q-How do you kill an elephant? A- An elephant gun Q- How do you kill a blue elephant? A- A blue elephant gun Q- How do you kill a red elephant? A- Strangle it until it turns blue then use a blue elephant gune Q- How do you kill a purple elephant?

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What do you call a crocodile in a dentist? I have no idea, but I'd hate to be that dentist.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Ham sandwich

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A black guy walks into a shoe store and buys a pair of size 14 shoes. The cashier smiles and says: so is it true what they say about big feet? The black guy laughs for a moment and responds: yeah it's really hard to find socks that fit.

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What happened to the boy who cried wolf? He died.

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Penis

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Why did the man wear a blue shirt? He didn't. He wore a green one.

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Your mama is so fat... Haha, that's a good joke.

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Roses are red, But ravens are black, please go to China, and never come back!

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How do you save a black guy from drowning? You don't.

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What happened after September 11, 2001? September 12, 2001

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Whats worse than a Worm in Your Apple? Being raped

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What did the Scientist say to the bookstore owner he met? "Hi."

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how do you kill a blonde? shoot her in the face with a pistol

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Emily Brunelle is skinny

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Why did the man drink his own piss? Because he was Bear Grylls

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Are you a human?

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What would you do for a Klondike bar? I'd probably pay in cash.

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Q:Whats worse than a worm in apple? A:The Holocaust. Q: What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? A: Were both lawyers! :D Q: What happens when you throw a purple rock in to a green river? A: It splashes

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Why did the monkey fall of the tree? Because Newtons law states that we are all under the influence of gravity and hence an object, in this case the monkey, will fall down if it failed to stay on the tree.

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Thomas the Tank Engine could see Express up ahead on the tracks! His driver shut off steam and applied his brakes. Ahead of him Gordon groaned "Ohhhhh stop your train! Stop your train! His driver and fireman jumped out quickly. Thomas tried his very hardest and eventually found himself slowing down. But there wasn't enough time and Thomas smashed right into the express. Seven people were killed and Thomas himself was smashed to pieces.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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