What happened in your mom's locked bedroom last night I don't know

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but I'm your stalker, welcome to my deserted warehouse.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his dying grandma in the hospital

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Where do you find a one-legged cat? Right where you left it.

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How do you drown a blonde? You hold her head underwater for a long time.

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roses are red violets are blue shut the fuck up or ill fuck you

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What do you get when you mix a dog with speeding bus? Nothing, you can't mix those two things.

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta pudding god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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What's the difference between me and a ghost? Ghosts aren't Dolphins!

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I used to play Skyrim but then I took an arrow in the knee. Then, I played MW3 until I took a bullet in the elbow. And now, I'm in the hospital wondering why people keep harming me.

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A horse walks into a bar The bartender says "Why the long face?" Unable to under stand English the horse shits on the floor and leaves

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How are Polish people and dogs the same? They aren't. One is a human being, and one is a dog. Do not be stupid.

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how do you kill a blonde? the way you would kill anyone, here are some examples gun knife noose or orange. wait wtf who kills someone with an orange

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have you ever tasted ethiopian food? ..... neither have they

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What is the funny thing about suicide? nothing...

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A sprayed behind is a clean BEHIND!

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Why are black people so good at sports? They practice.

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Whats the square root of x^2? Variables cant be gay

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What's the difference between a teacher and a train?!? The teacher is a highly-intelligent organism and the train is a large vehicle used in transporting goods over long distances on the ground.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it had earlier escaped from its cage and had since began to wonder around the local town

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How can you tell if a calendar is popular? From stock order lists and also from accounts records.

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Whats worse than than falling in a puddle on the way to a meeting? Getting shot while your at that meeting.

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Roes are red Violets are blue I felt silly for writing this Because violets are violet.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops