knock knock whose there? it's me, Connie oh hi Connie, wont you come in? oh i was just wandering if i could borrow your scotch tape ofcourse! one moment please. no problem. say, hows phil been? oh he's great, he just got a new job! here's your scotch tape! thank you so much! ....................... what a perfect scene. It is very unfortunate, though, for as Connie walked away from the family whom she borrowed the tape from, a car came by and with a single strike, killed her. this proves that nothing is perfect.

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Why did the shark put on a dress? She was getting ready for prom.

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So there's A blonde, a brunette and a redhead at a lake. they all swim across and have a picnic at the other end.

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yo mamma's so stupid, she is not that smart.

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Why did the seal get confused when a spider tried to high five him? Because spiders have eight legs.

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Where's my tractor?

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say this really fast dick chick, chick, dick, dick chick,chick dick, dick chick if you cant like it

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Why was Martin Luther King Jr. Shot? Because he was black.

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THIS IS NOT SPARTA! *pulls him out of the hole*

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What did Hitler say to his men before they got in the tanks? Get in the tanks

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whats yellow sticky and smelly? I dont know i was asking you

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Mitt Romney penis

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Why did the parrot fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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YOU SUCK RYAN V!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! U SUCK BALLS!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Suzie. How is that even possible?

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? 17

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Q: What's worse than being forced to eat your veggies? A: Being forced to kill your parents with a carrot.

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What did the dog say to the human. "Woof."

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whats the difference between chuck norris and a normal human being? nothing

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what do you call cheese that isn't yours? Chuck Norris' Cheese

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Hey, you want to hear an anti-joke? yeah, sure. .....well, too bad!

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The daring man said "here goes nothing." And nothing happened. -Tag

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Why did little Tommy sink to the bottom of the pool? He had no arms.

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Why did the 5 year-old go to the hospital? He had cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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