Roses are red Violets are penis

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What did the dog do when it raised its leg? It peed.

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Why don't they sell pharmaceuticals in the rain forest? Because it is to sparsely populated and not economically viable.

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side.

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a hard working man goes home after a long day at work to find that his wife left him for his even harder working father.

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What's brown and sticky? Shit

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Why did sally fall of the swing? SHE HAD NO ARMS!

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A Guy walks into a Bar, has a good time and leaves

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Whats brown and sticky? Brown glue

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Stubbing your toe

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You wanna hear a funny joke? Sorry, but I'm really not a funny guy. Not a comedian, you know.

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Why haven't the Miami "Big Three" won a championship together? They don't play as a team. They rely on three people to score all their points when there are at least two other people on the court at all times. They jinxed themselves because they thought they were going to win every title until their contracts were up.

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Iggy Azalea

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? None, because feminists can't change anything

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Three soldiers, one Japanese, one American, and one Italian were stuck in a desert. How did they escape? A rescue squad of thirty trained troops came down in a helicopter and brought them each to their respective homes except the Italian who was actually a Mafia boss so they put him in prison.

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Q: What did the littl boy with cancer get for christmas? A: Nothing, he didnt make it that far.

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A platypus walks into a bar, and was the only mammal in the building capable of laying an egg.

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Where does lady gags buy her bran flakes ? Sainsburys

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how do you keep a blonde busy for 7 to 8 hours. you give her m&m's and tell her to spell a word.

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CHICKEN it is a chickenly chickeny food we eat WRONG

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A: Have you ever heard of a blue waffle? B: Yes, i eat them every morning... A: DO you REALLY know what a blue waffle is? B: Yes...

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How do you confuse and idiot? Purple.

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Yo mama so fat, she most likely wont live to 40

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Blind people can't read this.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops