why did the first monkey fall out the tree? he was dead why did the second monkey fall out the tree? he was hit by the first one why did the third monkey fall out the tree? peer pressure why did the fourth monkey fall out the tree? he thought it was a game

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Yeah its just my way of saying that I appreciate you worrying so much about me, you are a sweet girl, Honestly I do not understand why the hell you guys are using Horsehead AntiJoke out of all places, there are far more terrible forgettable sites available, I mean this sites connection suddenly went from disgustingly terrible to fine and dandy, the Feds, the Interpol and even fucking Al Qaeda might be reading every single message, but there is no way in hell anyone can decipher the code format, if they could, they would have done it when I invented it sixteen years ago, Myself mind you, nothing subtle about me today apparently.

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How do you know that someone is polish ? They smell funny

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What did the turkey call the chicken? Nothing, turkeys can't speak, idiot.

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what do you call a somone who murders someone else? black.

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What did the Asian bookkeeper say to the Jewish dog? I love you

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, a poor african child probably has nothing and is starving to death while you and Chuck debate on how to spend your five dollars.

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MILEY CYRUS: ONLY GOD CAN JUDGE ME! ME: O GOD CALLED HE SAID YOUR A HOE TO

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Q. Whats the easiest way to end world hunger? A. Nuke Africa.

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"Doctor! Doctor! It hurts when I urinate!" "you may have a kidney stone"

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What happened to the boy who cried wolf? He died.

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Whats the best way to get a woman to sleep with you? Rape her

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Why did the boy throw the clock out the window? In a desperate, but unsuccessful attempt to save his mothers life, as a serial killer pulled her into his van

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Why did the kid punch the other kid. Because he was black.

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A christian was diagnosed with cancer. He refused chemo and prayed to god. Eventually, he died.

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Whats big, yellow and red? a school bus with a bunch of dead children.

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This schoolteacher was taking her first golfing lesson. She scored poorly from her lack of practice and experience and was turned off from the sport.

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what did the american say to the other american? get out of the way i gotta go to mcdonalds!

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Yo mommas so fat... that when it was rainning, she put on her rain coat and went outside, everyone was saying that the sun came up

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Why was he arrested? He broke the law.

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Here is a joke for you: minecraft -blarg

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YOUR MOM HAS A DICK IN HER ASSCHEEKS!!!

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whats blue and can be seen in the sky? the sky.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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