how do you fit 20 babies into a bucket? you put them into a blender. how do you get them out? chips.

Why did the cookie go to the doctor's office? He had brain cancer.

Your maternal figure contains so many Triglycerides, her belt size is greater than or equal to the circumference of the Earth.

what's the difference between fulham and sunderland ? hugh grant and lilly allen's dad

a kangaroo walks in to a bar and sits down. Kangaroo's live in Auustralia

I met an Asian man in Beijing, and he had very small feet. You know why? He was a midget.

What's the difference between me and convicted pedophile? -The pedophile's been caught ;)

Roses are red, violets are blue. Cassidy's a whore so open the door.

"What happened to John after he got drunk 12 years ago"- police "I don't really don't know that question"- John Jr.

What did the cop do when he saw two Mexicans buying coke? Warned them of the health risks of drinking carbonated soft drinks.

What did the Farmer say to his tractor? Most likely his life story, Farmers arn't always the most popular.

What's the best thing about 27 year old's? There are 20 of them.

What did the Vietnam veteran see on Christmas that changed his life? Nothing, he was blind. He continued to live his life in the same way, begging for drug money and getting bullied by all the other homeless vets.

-What do you call the brown spots in your yard? -Dog shit.

Why did the rabbit fall out of the tree? because it was dead Why did the bird fall out of the tree? because it was stapled to the rabbit

Why Did the Drug dealer die He Got Hit by a buss

A man walks into a bar with a sad-looking face. He orders a strong drink. The bartender asks him "What's wrong? You seem down." The man answers "Well, tough week. My wife was raped and murdered and my son was hit by a bus."

hi

I've got a dig bick

A blond, a brunnet and a read head all fall off a cliif, wich one did not die They all died you idiots

If you stretch all your skin out in a line, you will die of blood loss or possible infection

Why didn't Jimmy go to school? Because his school was nuked.

whats worse than being ugly? being aivy.

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard -you throw them.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...