After dinner, my girlfriend told me that we should go to my room to play with eachother's toys. It was very fun, I've always enjoyed the plastic dinosaur she decided to bring over.

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Q: What happened to the 16 year old pregnant black woman? A: She gave birth to a baby in 9 months.

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Why did suzy drop her popsicle? She was trampled by a homosexual moose.

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What do you call a baby who was raped and murdered? Funny

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what did the man do when he went to save the other man from drowning? drowned with him...

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Q: what do you call obama A:a dumbass

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"Doctor! Doctor! It hurts when I urinate!" "you may have a kidney stone"

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Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

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DOWN

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" So the horse says, "My ex-wife just got full custody of my kids and I'll never see them again."

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Whats the difference between football and basketball? Absolutely everything By darragh Hamilton

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Why did the african man wear no clothes? Because he liked being naked.

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I want to stick ma dick in a big bowl o puddin'

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A Black man, a Mexican, and a Midget, get in a car. They drive to the county fair and get snow cones and have a really fun time.

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Pickup line: Hey do you like flowers? Because you stole my flowers.

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What is the biggest fictional book ever made? Either the Bible, or the Dictionary.

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Guns don't kill people. Dangerous minorities do.

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A girl talks to her boyfriend about collage. What is his responce? Nothing. No one talks about college.

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What did the man with scissors do? He cut his balls off.

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How many blonde's does it take to change a lightbulb? Two, one to hold the ladder and one to peel the carrotts

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why was the boy mad at school? something probably upset him.

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A girl is on the phone with her boyfriend the boy friend has a rash the girl said put ointment on it ointment cures everything the boyfriend responded not cancer.

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Why do flamingos hold up one leg?f If they held up two they'd fall down.

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why did the man jump off the building? to commit suicide.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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