If a tree falls, and nobody is around to hear it, does it still make a sound? No. While the falling tree surely creates mechanical oscillations in the air, sound is defined as the mechanical oscillations in the air perceived by humans. Therefore, since no humans were around to hear the tree fall, it did not create a sound.

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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A man walks into a bar. He is then taken to the hospital for his concussion, seeing as the bar was made of metal

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father, prepare to die.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar and decide to have a drinking contest. Who won? The rabbi. The priest died of alcohol poisoning later that night.

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Whats the difference between Lady Gaga and a man? Nothing. I was lying about their being a difference.

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Q. what did the gay man say about the smoothie? A. he said "that is soooo good"

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Why did the dog cross the road? He didn't, he got run over

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What happened after Peter broke his toe? He went into cardiac arrest and died.

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A stop sign walks into a bar. Looks like somebody invented walking stop signs.

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wheres a place a cancer patient cant go? the hairdressers

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how do you fall off a building? you trip.

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roses are red violets are blue count my five damn finger , and the third one is for you!!!!!!!!

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dur dur dur dur said the child born during an earthquake

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A priest, a monk, and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order drinks and keep the conversation to non-controversial topics.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it had earlier escaped from its cage and had since began to wonder around the local town

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What did the Asian man do when he got lost in the desert? He ate his arms.

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anti jokes aren't always funny on here

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whats better than 69? doing it with jarads mum!!

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Sometimes I hope into bed and pretend I'm a carrot!!!!

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Knock Knock. Who's there. To. To who. To whom.

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Why does Polly want a cracker? Because meth is too intense.

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Your Mom is so poor she can't afford home-owners insurance.

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Women's rights

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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