I used to play Skyrim but then I took an arrow in the knee. Then, I played MW3 until I took a bullet in the elbow. And now, I'm in the hospital wondering why people keep harming me.

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A mother is in the kitchen making dinner for her family when her daughter walks in. “Mother, where do babies come from?” The mother than explains to the daughter the logistics of sex. The daughter seems to comprehend and walk away leaving the mother to cook.

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Why the mentally challenged man enter the bar? He's tired of being subject hate and criticism. He hates being the subject of jokes and being pointed at. He may not be able to tell you what 3x6 is, but he still has feelings. So because of all these inconsiderate people judging him, he now spends his days at the local bar, drowning his sorrows away in alcohol. I hope your happy.

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A: Knock knock B: Who's there? A: Hello, I'm a Jehovah's Witness and I would like to talk to you about religion for a few minutes. B: Thank you, but I'm not interested. A: OK, thank you for your time, sir. B: You're quite welcome. Good day. A: Have a nice afternoon. B: You too. Bye A: Ba-bye.

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Your mama is so fat she has a high BMI and is at a high-risk of Type II Diabetes.

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I have read and agree to the terms of service.

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What's the difference between red hair and black hair? Redheads vs. blackheads

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Why don't men ask for directions? They want to appear knowledgeable and strong. Asking for directions is sometimes considered a sign of weakness.

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What did Michael Jackson get for Christmas? Nothing he's dead

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he felt like it.

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What do you call a black man on a bicycle? A cyclist.

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what the difference between matthew and a retard? The retard can do math

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Ouch.

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....ZZzzzzz.....ZZzzzzz.....

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they!

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How do you make a girl wet? Throw her in the pool

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Yes. Just Yes.

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A fish and a human had a conversation. The conversation was not interesting because fish can't speak and the human felt awkward.

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What did the Man say to the elephant Nothing this man does not speak, the elephant does though

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What do you call a mexican driving a plane? Well.. nothing because you can't drive plane's but if a Mexican man was able to FLY a plane, he would be a pilot.

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I saw a man lying on the floor. He was dead.

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How can you tell if a calendar is popular? From stock order lists and also from accounts records.

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What's small, cold, and lifeless? A dead baby.

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how does a black woman find out if she is pregnant? she takes a pregnancy test

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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