A man walks up to a dead baby. The baby is dead

Knock knock. Who's there? Sorry, wrong number.

What is White over Black? Society.

A grasshopper goes into a bar It is stepped on and crushed.

How did the comedian end his show with a bang? He shot 4 people in the audience. It was a horrible sight and the remainder of the people in the audience were scarred for life.

what do you call a 40 year old man working at a burger king that dropped out of highschool dyslexic

How could problems have been avoided in the old west? Bigger towns

Why couldn't Mike answer the phone on time? On his way to the phone he was shot and killed.

There are three types of people in this world: The stupid. And the ones that can't count.

The WNBA

Chuck Norris once went skydiving. his parachute did not deploy. where he landed is now known as the grand canyon

A man walks into a bar. He asked the bartender if he accepts $100 bills. The bartender says "no".

What did the black guy, the latino guy, and the asian guy all have in common? They were all human beings

what did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede!

What do you call a snake with no arms? Normal. What do you call an amphibian with no arms? A caecilian. What do you call a girl with no arms? A poor, poor soul that is unfortunate enough to have had an amputation when young. Now, she can't go in public without being stared at. She can't catch herself when she trips. She can't ride a bike, bake cookies for her family, or be a NASA astronaut like she always dreamed. She is the normal ASDF Movie character.

What is invisible and smells like bananas? Monkey Farts.

What's the difference between a plum and a bunny? They're both purple. Except the bunny.

What do you call a black man? Jamal

Guy: If you can guess what's in my hand, you can have it. Girl: If it fits in one hand, you can keep it!

why did the kid get chemotherapy? because he had cancer

A dog goes to his food bowl. He eats his dinner.

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, I'm Blind.

what did the blind deaf mute boy get for christmas? some nice presents.

Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because she had no arms. A: Knock knock! B: Who's there? A: Not Sally.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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