You are so average that, if you entered an average contest, you'd come in middle place.

Why are elephants gray? So you don't get them confused with blueberries.

Why didn't the boy buy his mom a gift for Christmas? He was killed by a drunk driver two years ago

How do you know it's a Mexican's birthday? They bring cupcakes to school for your entire class to enjoy.

Some dude and his son are driving to school. They get into a car accident so the have to go the the hospital. But when the doctor comes in, the doctor says "I can't oporate on this boy! He's my son!" Who's the doctor? His Mom.

Think about it: Is mexico REALLY full of: Lowrides in candy ass sparkly colors such as lip red that bounce, (manly color right? Yeah sure baggot) which contains a whole street war gang of members inside and at least twenty tons of COCAINA! ...But does not have a horn that plays "la cucaracha" Seriously, you say yes right? Hey look at this guy he said yes everybody, but ITS WROOOOOOONG CUCARACHA OR GTFO OF MEXICO! Yeah... Because Mexico is shit, id would be racist if Mexicans didn't agree...

A baby boy and a baby girl are much alike when you eat them they die

daniel thinks 30 rock is funny

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't.

Knock Knock Who's There? Mom Mom who? Open the door idiot

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

What is a panda bear? A bear with black and white fur.

I just met you! And this is crazy! I just took bath salts, and yor face looks tasty!

Why did the child die? Natural causes.

What's worse than finding a hair in your soup? Slavery.

A seal walks into a club. Do you like my new shoes?

Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms Why couldn't she get back up? She blew up

how do you get a baby to stop swinging from a fan whack it with a shovel

Knock Knock! Oh god Johnny, someones at the door! Hide the heroin and bail man, BAIL!!!

What do you call a black man working for Bank of America? A successful individual.

hi my name is 50 cent my mom swallowd 2 quarters befor i was born dsthgiudghyudgfuawyg

A homeless guy walked up to me and said "Any change?", to which I replied, "Nope, your still homeless". We laughed and laughed. The he stabbed me.

p p p penis. penis's are big and juicy

A doctor, a farmer, and a blonde walk into a bar. The doctor orders red wine because he knows it's good for the heart. The farmer orders a Piña Colada because he likes fruit. The two men wait eagerly to what the blonde is about to order. The blonde opens her purse and says "Damn it, I can't find my credit card." Suddenly, a handsome young gentleman walks up to her says "Don't worry miss, I'll buy a drink for you. What are you having?" The blonde looks up and says "Don't worry? I just lost my credit card!" In a fit a of anger, the blonde storms out the bar and doesn't order anything.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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