What's long and hard and looks like plastic? A plastic baton.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What's the diffrents beetween a carrot and a dead baby? One I like to eat in my soup, the other one s a carrot.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Your mom was diagnosed with aids. Her prognosis was 6 months....clearly this joke is about the Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Your mom is so ugly that she decided to work as a prostitute and she died a virgin.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

So a black man hails a taxi...

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Biggest lie ever told... Mrs. Beiber, its a boy.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did the monkey fall from the tree? It was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What did the one legged girl do when her apartment caught on fire? She tried to hop to safety, but died of smoke inhalation.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What's the difference between an elephant and a toaster. A lot of things.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why couldn't the eleven year old get into the pirate movie? Because it was rated PG-14 and he was unaccompanied by a mature adult.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

It was just Michael J. Fox's birthday I wonder if he got in trouble for shaking his presents.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

How many WOMEN does it take to change a light bulb? YOU ALREADY KNOW ITS GONNA BE MORE THAN ONE!

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A priest a rabbi and an iman are stuck in the desert. After walking for days without rescue or civilisation in sight, and rapidly running out of food and water, they decide to each pray to their respective gods for rescue, and in doing so solve the ultimate question of which religion is the true religion. They all die.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

You have 5 $1 dollar bills. Your mom rapes you and you still have 1 $5 dollar bill.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Your mother is so fat that I'm starting to worry about her health.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Steve,Jerry and tom all go into the mens toilets, because they are men.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

How do you get a clown to stop smiling? Throw a brick at him.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van!

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Obama

thumb_up thumb_down +27

hey guys check out my cool youtube video at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ivQ_bezJjK0

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Two Haitians walk into a bar and it collapses

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What's big, yellow and green? The sun, i was kidding about the green

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Hitler was in a shampoo advert that everyone bought Now people must be dying to take a shower

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What do you get if you cross a bulldog with a schitzu? A half breed prone to allergies and breathing problems.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops