Why can't the dinosaur eat M&M's? He is dead. He used to rule the Earth 65 Million years ago, though. Dinosaurs are reptiles. Whales are not. Meow?

thumb_up thumb_down +12

If an atom bomb falls in a town, does it make a sound? Not to most people, as they would be killed in a massive catastrophe that will be etched into their ancestors minds for years to come, not to mention radiation poisoning and deformation.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Knock knock. Who's there? Open the fucking door. Open it! This is a fucking robbery. This is not a fucking joke. Get down on the ground. Shut that baby up. Shut that fucking baby up! Now! Get on the fucking ground or I swear to Christ I will fucking end your life. Tell the kids to go to their room. Do it. Do it, you fucking bitch! Where's the fucking jewelry? You got any money stashed anywhere? Come on, I know it's here. Keys? Your husband got any guns? Give me everything valuable or I swear to god, I will fucking murder you in front of your son. The woman was brutally raped for hours.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Roar, roar! I am the king of the jungle! But did you know the lion would be defeated by a polar bear in a battle between the two?

thumb_up thumb_down +12

I was going to tell my mom an anti-joke. Then she died.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What is worse than seeing your whole family die? Leaving your wallet on the bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Knock Knock Who's there Bannana O He lives next door

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why was the woman's purse so heavy? Because it had a lot of stuff in it.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What is the difference between a duck?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what did the dinosaur say to the other dinosaur nothing dinosaurs can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what did the jaguar and the girl have in common? Spots, the girl had the chicken pox

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Murder me once, shame on you.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

I had sex. Just kidding.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you call a cow in the grass... A cow in the grass... Dumbas*

thumb_up thumb_down +10

1+1 =? Too

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline. Now heres a boy who can't read. Ngjmhgmgk? MTGKMJHGMjhkmjh(hgjnhgfjhgfj nj nvj vj kvnmg ifh) njki nj jo ncj kgjkfngjfk jkn jkgfngkfn gkn kgfnigkfnmg km kgf kglfn kglf kglgkflnm klnm mklm khlgfpnkmfklnmlk mbk lm klgfnmk gfmkngfnkgfklfknm m k kf mkfl m k gflmgkffmkopfdjtorper srhes hngfdlj;sdnht rktrtnr rdpkng ngngf.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What happened to the prisoner who dropped the soap while in the shower with other men? Another prisoner picked up and gave it to him and finished showering and felt squeaky clean.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what rhymes with sloth? -RaPe-

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you say the big head boy? Brush yo teeth

thumb_up thumb_down +8

why was the man gay? because he likes men.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what did Santa Claus say to Nikki Minaj? I really admire your musical talents

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock Knock Who's There? Due to the fact that the man asked who's there instead of promptly opening the door, the women on the other side was raped and killed, because she went to that house to seek help.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What should you do when your refrigerator is running? Tell it to FREEZE!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the chicken cross the road? No particular reason. It probably wasn't even aware the the ground it was crossing is what's termed as a road.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops