Why did the chicken cross the road? For a joke.

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a hard working man goes home after a long day at work to find that his wife left him for his even harder working father.

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What is the biggest, most elaborate lie? Santa Clause

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Why did the gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chickens foot.

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A blonde is running for her life and sees a sign that says "GO LEFT TO SURVIVE". She goes right and she survives.

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Roses are red Violets are blue... No they are not they come in many different colors from cross breeding and different environments.... YOU ARE WRONG

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how long does it take a black woman to shit? 3 to 5 minutes depending on the food she ingested earlier that day

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Whats brown and sticky? Brown glue

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How are friends like bananas? If you peel off their skin and eat them, they die.

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what has four legs but cant walk? a dog after A-N-A-L

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What does a Dominican and a Russian have in common... they are both thinking of a funny anti-joke to post on this site...

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A blind man walks into a bar. Then a chair. Then a table. (TD)

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man was playing with his little toddler. the man put his thumb through his fingers and said "got your nose" the baby laughed. the cops then burst down his door and arrested him for robbery of personal items. they werent laughing.

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How do you get a one-armed blonde out of a tree? Get a ladder and help her down.

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Schroedingers cat walked into a bar... and it didnt.

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Q: What do you call a black preist? A: Father

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Q: Why did the rich Wallstreet business man move into Harlem? A: Because sex offenders weren't welcome anywhere else.

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A white straight man, a black gay man, and an Asian bisexual woman walk into a bar. They are enjoying their drinks until one overly intoxicated man makes a remark towards the group in reference to their diversity in race, sexual orientation, and sex. The bar crowd is enthused with the drunk man's genius in not only constructing a joke to cover all three categorical descriptions of the group, but in guessing each member's sexuality based on their respective appearances.

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What did the abortion say to the womb? I'm outta here.

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Nohypocondrism: When you feel fine and everyone keeps telling you you are a sick bastard. Charisma: Hey, that guy that changed my life killed the neighbor, cool rite? I mean that damn neighbor did say nothing to me when I said hi. Solitude: When the room is so overcrowded that you feel small and alone. I think that people that are jack of all trades and master of none are stupid... I AM JACK OF NO TRADES AND MASTER OF ALL! I am nothing, because nothing lives on forever, nothing is unbreakable, nothing is really awesome on a terrible day... I am also Nobody, because Nobody has more money than me.. FUUUUUUUU..

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What do you call two black men kicking a ball? Soccer.

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Q: What has four legs and an arm. A: A pitbull on a playground

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Why did the farmer go to the market? Because his butt was on fire!

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Knock Knock Whos there? I dunno I didnt answer the door

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops