Q: What do Obama and George Washington have in common? A: They are both intelligent, trustworthy presidents who truly care for what is best for the United States. Except for Obama.

What black and white and red all over? A panther I was lying about the red and white.

I'm gay. No homo.

"You know what my motto in life is?" "No" "Oh, that's a shame."

What did the leper say to the prostitute? Hello Prostitute.

Why Is Jarrod spencer gay Coz he is

How are a grape and a duck alike? They're both purple... except for the duck.

Your momma's so fat that she should probably be worried about the increased risk of cardiovascular disease.

Roses are red, Violets are purple

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How does a penguin make pancakes out of skis? Purple because it's the best.

Dory from Finding Nemo: "Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy- Hey, I just met you."

What the difference between a alien and you nothing

whats the difference between colby and a high schooler? Colby hasn't matured yet

Knock knock. Who's there? Mark. Oh Hai Mark

Why was Hellen Kellers leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had just been brutally raped by a lawnmower. The lawnmower had been hit by a car. The woman driving the car was suffering from Alzheimers disease. Which then escalated from the stress of the accident that she took her cat and ripped his right ass cheek then continued on with her day

a kangaroo walks in to a bar and sits down. Kangaroo's live in Auustralia

A guy is in Weekends Millionaire. He says: I could use a lifeline. Quizmaster: Which one would you like? Guy: Anyone, I have AIDS

Penis

Yo mamma's so old she is dead.

So my girlfriend says I'm a pedophile. What does she know she's nine.

what do get when you blend zebra, a cow and a walrus? A not very good smoothie

So a horse walks into a bar, animal service is called and after being unable to locate the owner he is put down.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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