What did Freddie Mercurys father say at Freddies funeral. "Thats the cleanest hole our Freddies ever been in".

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How do you get a one armed man to fall out of a tree? Wave.

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A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walks briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

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What do you call 10,000 black men with their heads sticking out of the ground? Afro-turf

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What do you tell the woman with two black eyes? Nothing. You already told her twice.

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Thank you for helping to save the animals. You may send your donation as a check to "Anti-Joke" at 555 Main Street, Anytown, CA.

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If you are my friend like it!

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Narrator: A ghost walks into a church. It is a Jewish church during a Friday night service. Huh. That ghost looks a lost like Hitler. Oh crap, everyone run for your lives! Stranger: GHOSTBUSTERS! Narrator: what, the, heck? Ghostbuster: let's kill some ghosts! Wait a minute. Adolf, is that you? Hitler ghost: John? Ghostbuster: Adolf, Buddy! Narrator:...... Hitler ghost: Hey, John! Wanna grab a drink? Ghostbuster: sure. let's get out of here. Narrator: This joke has officially lost all meaning. I don't even know why I'm submitting it any more! And get this! I AM HALF JEWISH!

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What happened when the joke was bad? crippled up like cancer of the eye

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whats worse than your little sster being raped? her being raped by your father.

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What did the athletic white boy say to the aids carrying African boy? Ha.

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Bake until golden at 375

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?ti saw won troffe eht htrow t'nsaw yllaer siht

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your mommas so ugly it is affecting her self esteem!

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Why did the plane crash? -Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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How do Chinese people get their names? From their parents.

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A ninja walks into a bar the bartender asks "what would you like?" The ninja says "i'll have two green eyes" the bartender says "we dont have green eyes this is america" so the ninja is so mad that he goes home and brutally beats his wife with a spatula.

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How do you kill yourself You jump of a cliff

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Are you from Tennessee? Because I can tell by your accent.

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What do you get when you combine Seth Rogen and Harrison Ford? A very risky and expensive medical experiment.

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Q:Why did the black man shoot the white man? A:The black man happened to be extremely good at paintball.

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Knock Knock.

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Why did Coolio appear in the joke below? He did not, he was not for real at this particular situation... Well It was actually a typo because some douchebag told me Coolio sang that song and I forgot to change the name after finding the truth... Moral: YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

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What is black, has either black or yellow stripes, and cannot climb trees? A parking lot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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