babe whos moaning? are you with another woman? guy:god damn if you would stay in the kitchen we would never have any problems.

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What is long and black? Some umbrellas.

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When life gives you melons, youre probably dyslexic.

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1. A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!'' The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: ''The driver just insulted me!'' The man says: ''You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you.''

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A man walks into a bar, has a drink, pays the bartender, and leaves.

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Q-How do you kill an elephant? A- An elephant gun Q- How do you kill a blue elephant? A- A blue elephant gun Q- How do you kill a red elephant? A- Strangle it until it turns blue then use a blue elephant gune Q- How do you kill a purple elephant?

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What's better than winning the Special Olympics? Having legs.

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What is the difference between assault and aggravated assault? Aggravated assault is aggravated, whereas assault is aggravated.

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What's pink, wrinkly and hangs out your trousers? Your nan.

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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penis

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why dont black people go on cruises? there not falling for that one again

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What is better than winning a medal at the special olympics? Not being retarded

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Q. What did the fat guy get for his birthday? A. diabetes

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Which is correct grammar: 'I hasn't a penis got' or 'I doesn't a penis has'? Answer: They're both wrong.

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Q:If a lesbian woman is wearing a jean jacket, high heels, camouflage shorts, and sunglasses, what gender is she ? A: Sheep.

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The gay man came out of the closet.....Not that he wanted the world to know about his alternative lifestyle but because he is fairly wealthy and keeps his trousers on hangers in the rear of his walk in closet.

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Wanna hear a funny joke? Yes.

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How much coke can Charlie Sheen do? Enough to kill two and a half men.

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How do you stop a bus? Throw small children in front of it. Except it didn't work for the boy with ice cream.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? I don't remember the rest of the joke but your mom's a whore.

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A man walks into a man walks into a man walks into a man.

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010011100110100101100011011001010010000001110100011100100111100100101100001000000110001001110101011101000010000001110100011010000110010100100000011010100110111101101011011001010010000001101001011100110010000001110011011011110110110101100101011101110110100001100101011100100110010100100000011001010110110001110011011001012

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Yo mamma's handwriting is so bad that its barely legible to most people!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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