Your mother is so fat that she got diabetes and later died of an unrelated illness.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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I'm a little teapot, short and stout. Here is my handle, here is my spout. When I get all steamed up here me shout: Absolutely nothing because I'm a teapot you maniacal psychopath.

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Communism, Capitalism and an Irish man walk into a bar. Communism says, “I’ll buy the drinks but I require your complete obedient consent.” Capitalism says, “No I’ll buy the drinks but I require that you pay me back with interest” and the Irish man says “No I… I don’t feel very well at all… Oh shite I’ve got the bloody runs!” He then proceeds to shit myself.

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Whats the square root of x^2? Variables cant be gay

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How often does a black women poop? Every nine months.

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Why wasn't Fred invited to he party? Because he's been dead for five years

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Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN's ON FIRE!!!!!

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Q: Why was the duck hands down hilarious? A: It wasn't, ducks don't have hands and with human beings able to be equipped with emotions such as to see an object or living organism as funny, do not view these mammals in a humorous manner.

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Why did the woman cross the road? She didn't. They are no roads in the kitchen.

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Q.If you are European in the bathroom, what are you in the kitchen? A. A woman.

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what is 6.9? a good thing ruined by a period

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why did the truck crash into a tree? cause staplers dont know how to drive

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Your Mom.

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Q: What is the differenc between a Jew and a boy scout? A: The boy scout comes back from camp.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because I threw a fridge at her.

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I don't always drink beer, but when I do, I beat my family.

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Where do astronaut cows go? Nowhere. There's no such thing as an astronaut cow.

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Whats worse than a dead whore? 9/11

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms Why couldn't she get back up? She blew up

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the

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If you analyze this joke closely you' ll realize its not funny.

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What did the dog say to the cat? Nothing, animals can't talk.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? It's not. Numbers are not living organisms and thus are incapable of experiencing emotion.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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