What did the black kid get for Christmas? A bike that his father paid for with the salary he made as an accountant at a local bank.

What do the holocaust and 9/11 have in common? They were both terrible tragedies that people will look back upon in sadness for years.

A man walked into a bar and it hurt.

You're in a room with your friend, and you see some one being eaten by a monster. Who's getting eaten? No one, monsters aren't real.

Knock knock Who's there? Joke Joke who? Auntie Joke Great, could you bake me those cookies I like.

Q: why did a sanke have a rattle A: it was born wiith it

if life gives you lemons...chuck them back and say i wanted muffins instead!!!!

What's worse than finding an apple in your wo- wait, what?!

why did the man crash a plane into the twin towers? he was a clumsy terrorist going for the sears tower

What do you get when you mix a dog with speeding bus? Nothing, you can't mix those two things.

A man walk into a bar. He then falls down, quickly picks himself up, and continues his life.

Joseph had been temporarily blinded for over a year. While blind, he saw the doctor who told him he would regain sight the next morning when he woke up. For this special moment, Joseph decided that the first thing he wanted to see was his wife. So, his wife decided to stay up all night so she was in the right position for when Joseph woke up. However, when Joseph woke up and opened his eyes his wife wasn't there so he was a little bit annoyed.

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Sir, your wife has been killed. Please open the door so that we may discuss this matter. The man then opens the door and listens to the tale of how a disgruntled worker opened fire in a grocery store, killing 13 people including his wife. Unable to cope with this and the fact both his parents passed away earlier that year he later hangs himself soon after the police leave.

Two girls walk into a bar. One ducks.

How did the black kid drop out of highschool? He got bad grades.

if life gives you lemons you probably have problems

Whats worse than 12 babys stapled to a tree? 1 baby stapled to 12 trees!

How do you save someones life? Do not kill them.

Whats worse than the holocaust??having a downstndrome for a child

Yo momma eats healthy, exercises regularly and is likely in decent physical condition.

why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the retard's house *knock knock* who's there? the chicken

Knock knock. Who's there? Open the fucking door. Open it! This is a fucking robbery. This is not a fucking joke. Get down on the ground. Shut that baby up. Shut that fucking baby up! Now! Get on the fucking ground or I swear to Christ I will fucking end your life. Tell the kids to go to their room. Do it. Do it, you fucking bitch! Where's the fucking jewelry? You got any money stashed anywhere? Come on, I know it's here. Keys? Your husband got any guns? Give me everything valuable or I swear to god, I will fucking murder you in front of your son. The woman was brutally raped for hours.

what did batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile "robin, get in the batmobile"

There was a white man who sat on a log. then suddenly a Chinese man popped out and said he had to leave. he left.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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