Roses are angry Violets are too My head is scratchy I need shampoo

What's black and blue and red all over? I don't know, that's why I was asking you.

Why did the Jew die? Because Hitler was born...

Why is there world hunger? Because you touch yourself at night.

What's Black white and red all over? Half a penguin

Whats the best way to get a woman to sleep with you? Rape her

whats big green and fuzzy and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? a pool table

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you dirty racist.

If she's old enough for jail, than shes old enough to rail.

Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

Q:Whats worse than a worm in apple? A:The Holocaust. Q: What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? A: Were both lawyers! :D Q: What happens when you throw a purple rock in to a green river? A: It splashes

A priest, a midget, and the toothfairy walk into a bar. Barack Obama.

Why was Hellen Kellers leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

What did the cast of sex and the city get for Christmas Nothing Sarah Jessica Parker is Jewish

Why really answer a question when you can just respond, "because you touch yourself." For example, Q: Why did fluffy die? A: Because you touch yourself.

Billy's alarm clock went off at 8:00 AM but Billy was really tired but still his Dad forced him to go to school.

A duck flies to someone's backyard pool. Moments later it takes a dump , then suddenly flies away.

two men are having a conversation a third man walks what does he do? patiently waits as to not seem rude.

How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

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call 803-389-9808 for a good time ;D

if a cat is mean and a dogs a bitch then what do u call your wife? A MEAN ASS BITCH

A man walks into a bar, and orders a drink. He reaches into his back pocket, but cannot find his wallet. The man was pick pocketed by a skilled thief on his walk to the bar. The man quickly makes calls to cancel his credit cards and minimize the financial loss.

why did the imagrant cross the road the cops were on his tail for false identity of the chicken

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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