roses are red violets are blue i am retarded i like pancakes

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A man runs over a woman with his car, whose fault was it? The woman's for trying to cross the street in the dark without a crosswalk.

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Q: Where did Bethany hide the dead baby? A: In the trash can

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Whats the difference between football and basketball? Absolutely everything By darragh Hamilton

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Did the boy ever tell you how he died? Trick questions he's dead, deceased bodies can't talk.

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Your friend is so retarded I am getting a bit worried and his mother should take him to get tested for mental retardation.

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Curiosity killed the cat and was sentenced to prison for animal abuse.

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What do u get when u mix a dinosaur and a lesbian? A-lick-alot-a-puss

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Guess what? Holocaust

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Sam alexander is also r8 g4y

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I'm gay. No homo.

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Q: What happens when you hit a man with a car? A: You speed away hoping no one saw, you spend the next month and a half agonizing over your crime as it consumes you because you think of the poor man's family, then you either go to prison or hang yourself from a fan all because you wanted road dome....

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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What do you call a blind fish? Amblyopsidae.

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An eggo waffle had three friends that he will be inviting to his Superman birthday party. WHich friend will get the first piece of cake? Nobody the party was canceled.

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What do dead people think when they die? Nothing,they're dead.

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Why does one not simply walk into Mordor? Mordor doesn't really exist and thus is physically impossible to walk into, or enter by any means really.

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How does a penguin make pancakes out of skis? Purple because it's the best.

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Two scientists walk into a bar. One says "I'll have H20", the other says "I'll have a beer." The first one is the one to drive them to their homes.

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What's the same about eggnog and a computer? You can search the web. Except that's only true for one of them.

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What happened to the short kid on april 30th: His girlfriend broke up with him

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Knock Knock Who's there Nobody is here. This is just a feeble attempt of your subconsious to convince yourself you have someone who cares about you in the least bit to mask the horrible wretched pain of loneliness and suffering that is the enternal damnation of your life.

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what happens when two small children jump into a pool full of pedophiles? They splash around and have fun

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if a cat is mean and a dogs a bitch then what do u call your wife? A MEAN ASS BITCH

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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