What's 4+7 47

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "Only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

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Which is correct grammar: 'I hasn't a penis got' or 'I doesn't a penis has'? Answer: They're both wrong.

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A black guy, a white guy and a Pakistani are walking together when they see a lamp, They rub the lamp and out pops a Genie who, with only three wishes to grant, lets them have one wish each. The Pakistani wishes that all people of Pakistani origin are returned to their country with health and wealth. The black guy thinks this is a good idea and asks for the same for all Africans and Caribbean's. The white guy says "are there really no more Pakistani's or blacks in the country?" The Genie confirms this is accurate. The white guy is devastated, who will drive the buses, operate the power stations, produce the medicines and work in the hospitals that these people did? I wish for them to be returned.

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Oh no! My life is ruined!

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penis

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what's brown and sticky? A stick!

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Did the chicken cross the road? No because it was in a fenced in area like all farm animals should be

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What do you call a person who uses food stamps? Poor. What do you call a black person who uses food stamps? Still poor.

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? How did the chicken get out of the henhouse?

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Did you know brown and green rhyme? Just not with each other.

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what do you get when you put a baby in a blender? salsa how to you get it out? tostitos

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What is brown and sticky? Black tar heroin.

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A baby crawls into an abortion clinic.

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You know what your problem is? I'm too good looking.

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What's worse than standing in line at Walmart? Being raped. What's worse than paying an outrageous amount for whatever it is you bought at Walmart? Being pregnant with a rape baby.

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If it hadn't been for Cotton Eyed Joe My wife and kids would still be alive.

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what time is it? 3:16

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There once was a man from Nantucket who had an affinity for wicker furniture.

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What happened after September 11, 2001? September 12, 2001

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what happens when you get ben roethlisberger, and a young college student? a very pleasant evening, helping ben cope with all the drama he has been in the past year leading him to the 2011 super bowl against the green bay packers.

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Both my milk chocolate and my white chocolate are brown. Why? I crapped on my white chocolate.

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What's funnier than an knock knock joke???? Dancing narwhals pooping talking soup

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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