Why cant madeleine mccann play ps3? ive only got an xbox

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Q: What has four legs and an arm. A: A pitbull on a playground

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What doesnt have arms and legs? A brick.

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what do you call a man with three eyes and eleven fingers? his name

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Why did the leper go back into the shower? he missed a spot.

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So two friends walk into a bar. One says to the bartender, "Get me a Miller Lite please." The bartender says, "Sure." The other friend says, "Get me a Cosmopolitan please." The bartender stares at him and says, "That is not the drink I was expecting you to order, but I respect your decision."

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Why was the boy rolling down the hill? Cause he's stupid

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What do you call someone too young to drink? A minor

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Why didn't Jimmy go to school? Because his school was nuked.

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Penisland

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What's wrong with woman Everything

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What's the difference between a baseball player on the Yankees, and one on the Red Sox? One was named Jeff, the other wasn't.

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Jesus was nailed to the cross by Roman guards... His disciples were kept behind a line of guards and they could not hear Jesus speak. They can see he was saying something, so they had to get closer to hear what he was saying. John dodged a guard and ran towards Jesus, but a guard cut his leg off with a sword... Peter ran for it and got past John but another guard cut off one of his legs... Matthew saw this opportunity to dodge both guards and jets past both John and Peter and gets to the foot of the cross... Jesus looks down at Matthew and says, "Matthew.... I can see your house from here!"

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Q: What's different about a boy and a girl? A: Nothing. There used to be a notable difference but nowadays you have to strain in order to tell them apart.

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Where did Suzie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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How do you find Will Smith in a snowstorm? You look for the black guy.

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Why couldn't the young girl play outside with her friends? She was bed ridden with terminal cancer.

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Why didn't the girl put on her mascara? Because she was too poor to buy any.

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she wasn't 18

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A guy walks into a bar. He's thirsty and wants a beer.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt it hit a poll and died of brain damage the next day

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whats the difference between a pair of shoes, and a computer. alot.

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What do you call a blonde girl with ponytails? A cheerleader.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken crossed the road accidentaly as chickens are absent minded.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops