(speaking to an orphan) knock, knock who's there not your parents

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A man walks into a bar and says "hey, it's me!". Turns out that wasn't him.

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whats your name? bumder:)

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A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

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My name is never spelt right so its all good

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Why was the toddler laying in the middle of the road? Because she was the victim of a hit and run...

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An eggo waffle had three friends that he will be inviting to his Superman birthday party. WHich friend will get the first piece of cake? Nobody the party was canceled.

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A black guy walks into a shoe store and buys a pair of size 14 shoes. The cashier smiles and says: so is it true what they say about big feet? The black guy laughs for a moment and responds: yeah it's really hard to find socks that fit.

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What is worse than finding a worm in an apple? The Holocaust

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Why did the bus drop a boy holding ice cream? Its driver was not paying full attention on the road and was sentenced 15 years for manslaughter.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names

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What did the man with scissors do? He cut his balls off.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? He's not.

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Knock knock! Who's There? @HurricaneKris4 on Twitter Ok I'll follow you...

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What's round and red? A red and round solid.

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Did the boy ever tell you how he died? Trick questions he's dead, deceased bodies can't talk.

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There was a baby, and it wouldnt stop crying. So the mom shook it and shook it. Then it stopped crying.

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How does a penguin make pancakes out of skis? Purple because it's the best.

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How do you kill the President of the United States? Your name has been reported to the authorities.

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what did the man do when he went to save the other man from drowning? drowned with him...

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My neighbor's kid was running around yelling magical spells. I said "Wow, you really want to be like Harry Potter, don't you?". He said "Yes!". So, I killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

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How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? none, you can't see them in the dark. V

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Why couldn't the kid get into the pirate movie? Tickets were sold out.

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There was this women at a banana festival, but she didn't like bananas. So she split

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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