What's the cure to Ebola? Suicide

Your social life.

Q. What does McDonald's and Michael Jackson have in common? A. They both stick their meat in 13 year old buns.

why was tommy so sad?............because he had a frog stapled to his face.

What is laying in the corner of the living room of an abandoned house and keeps getting smaller over the years? A decaying baby left there by a crack-head.

Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: Your mother sucks.

What's the difference between a catcher's mitt and Lou Ferrigno? If you seriously said "I don't know, what?" I suggest getting a medical examination by a professional psychologist.

Why did the toast land butter side down. The devil visited earth that day and therefore everything that could go wrong did.

How do you stop a car? Put on the Brake

Yo momma so thin, she admitted herself into an in-patient counseling center for anorexic and bulimic patients.

Whats worse then getting caught in the rain with no umbrella? Aids.

Your mom is so fat, She should go to a doctor because her cholesterol is abnormally high.

If you challenge the tarsier to a staring contest, it wouldnt undersand a word you say, but it would stare at you when you would think that was apropos. the tarsier wouldnt really think anything and would just make a peepee

What do you call a prison inmate with no arms or legs? John. That's his name.

what is worse than bitting into your apple and finding a worm? 9/11

Billy comes home from playing with his friend as he walks to his front yard he comes across his mother...she is dead on the floor his friend then says "im SO sorry your mom is dead but at least you still have your dad" Billy than replies "my mom is my dad" billy then is put into a foster home and spends years trying to recover from the fact that he is the freak offspring of a hermaphrodite

What type of person does a black guy go to when he's sick? The doctor

Nobody knows why she swallowed the fly, she probably won't die.

A month after the nuclear bombing of Hiroshima, a typhoon hit the city killing another 2,000 people.

Wow, that makes your name a lot more comfortable to say... Not type, and you seem to be more sensitive than non-red hair girls. Besides its really nice, why do you dye it? Is it like red or ginger?

How high is a Chinaman

WNBA

roses are red facebook is blue no mutual friends who the heck are you

Bob:well Joe, its been tough latley, I hats my life Joe: I don't give a tuck, ur retarded, you have never had any friends and I am sure that the school will have a pep fest when u hang ur self in ur bedroom. So go now! I don't know why u even r talking to me and I don't know why I am responding

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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