How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Depends on how much you compress them.

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Why didn't Sally make it to school on time? She got savagely beaten and raped.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Billy. Oh, come on in. You could have just knocked on my door or rang doorbell without saying "Knock Knock" though, that's kind of childish.

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yo mama so fat that the doctor asked for her weight not her phone number!

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What did Freddie Mercurys father say at Freddies funeral. "Thats the cleanest hole our Freddies ever been in".

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead.

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How do you get a one armed man to fall out of a tree? Wave.

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Roses are ??red Vilotes are ????blue I am single and now so are u???? no go move on I don't need u I have some weed and I'm willing to kill u

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Thank you for helping to save the animals. You may send your donation as a check to "Anti-Joke" at 555 Main Street, Anytown, CA.

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What do you tell the woman with two black eyes? Nothing. You already told her twice.

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If you are my friend like it!

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Narrator: A ghost walks into a church. It is a Jewish church during a Friday night service. Huh. That ghost looks a lost like Hitler. Oh crap, everyone run for your lives! Stranger: GHOSTBUSTERS! Narrator: what, the, heck? Ghostbuster: let's kill some ghosts! Wait a minute. Adolf, is that you? Hitler ghost: John? Ghostbuster: Adolf, Buddy! Narrator:...... Hitler ghost: Hey, John! Wanna grab a drink? Ghostbuster: sure. let's get out of here. Narrator: This joke has officially lost all meaning. I don't even know why I'm submitting it any more! And get this! I AM HALF JEWISH!

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whats worse than your little sster being raped? her being raped by your father.

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What did the athletic white boy say to the aids carrying African boy? Ha.

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Bake until golden at 375

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Q: What did the twin tower say to the other twin tower? A: I'm falling for you.

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your mommas so ugly it is affecting her self esteem!

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Why did the plane crash? -Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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How do you kill yourself You jump of a cliff

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A ninja walks into a bar the bartender asks "what would you like?" The ninja says "i'll have two green eyes" the bartender says "we dont have green eyes this is america" so the ninja is so mad that he goes home and brutally beats his wife with a spatula.

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How do Chinese people get their names? From their parents.

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What do you get when you combine Seth Rogen and Harrison Ford? A very risky and expensive medical experiment.

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Q:Why did the black man shoot the white man? A:The black man happened to be extremely good at paintball.

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Knock Knock.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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