Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog

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Knock Knock Who's There? Just open the damn door I forgot my key and I really need to pee

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Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline. Notice how Anti-Joke MISSPELLED "user", writing "uses" instead. Probably most of you didn't notice until I posted this :)

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(insert command here) Oh yeah, well I want world peace.

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What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson? I thought you were dead.

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Roses are red Violets are blue im a retard dictionary

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Whats a box full of sand? a sandsquare

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Every 20 seconds, a child in africa starves to death... Every 30 seconds, an obese american teen stuffs their face with McDonalds

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What is a Mexican's favorite sport? Cross country.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because he was dead. Q: Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? A: Because he was stapled to the monkey.

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What did the snow flake which could talk say to the other snow flake which could talk None of us are the same.

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An Asian teenager bought his first gun, and proceeded to go hunting with his father in the wilderness.

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what is the vent wound on the ladies that can never heal???

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whats worse than 10 dead babies in my garage? 11 dead babies in my garage

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Roses are tits, Violets are tits, I love tits. Tits.

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Whats hotter than a sunny day. A pot of boiling water.

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You are in England which has a law about not moving traffic when these idk some kinda swans cross the road. You see a fat woman in a car and she is waiting for the swans to cross the road and she can't drive the car else she would get in trouble by law. What do you do? Feed her

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When life hands you lemons... do not squeeze them, for juice may squirt into your eye, causing severe pain.

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Why did Thomas miss school? Because he was sick

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69

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What's invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts. What's invisible and smells like rabbit farts? Carrots, if you're blind.

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Roses are white, tulips are white, wait whos been masturbating in my garden!

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If I was a regular squirrel, I would be pissed at flying squirrels.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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