Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Nock Nock. Whose there? The chicken.

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Your mom is SO ugly, I entered her in an ugly contest, and she came in fourth place!

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How do you get three Canadians out of a pool? Say "Hey guys time to get out of the pool."

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What did the three bears say when rhey discovered goldilocks? Nothing. They mauled her to death.

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How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie into in!

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Guess how old my lil bro is...Well your wrong cause he's dead.

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69. Yeah- that's my street address.

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Why should people with Alzheimer's not tell jokes? .......................................................................................................................................... SEVEN EIGHT NINE!!!!!

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A guy walks into a bar. He orders a coke. The bartender looks at the gentlemen with a little smile and says "Just a coke?"

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Suzie. How is that even possible?

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Man is hit by a falling tree his friend immediately responds "Got Wood" the man is now paraplegic

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When life gives you lemon squeeze it in someone's face

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The mighty wizard said "come fourth cowardly lion and receive bravery" but he came fifth and got absolutely nothing. Todo came fourth and got the bravery.

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PENlS.

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What's the difference between 10 dead babies and a red sports car? A red sports car was never a living organism.

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wnba

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Why did I have sex with your mom? Because she was a beautiful individual with a fine taste in the classical arts. She also offered me a ride to her place for a delicious 3 course meal. Afterwards our romance blossomed and we decided to have sexual intercourse to show our mutual appreciation for each other.

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What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

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A little boy started choking on a condom. His father came and was in a great panic. "Please don't leave me. I don't want to lose you!" he cried over and over again. Then his wife came in and said "it's alright darling, there's plenty more in the drawer". "Oh, thank God for that, I thought I lost it there!" dad replied.

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I used to play Skyrim but then I took an arrow in the knee. Then, I played MW3 until I took a bullet in the elbow. And now, I'm in the hospital wondering why people keep harming me.

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What happened in your mom's locked bedroom last night I don't know

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Why did Kelly never see Wass? cus she never looked in right places !!!

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A black man walks in to a bar, and is promptly escorted from the premises, for being under the age of 21

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What do a ginger kid get for christmas ? it dusen't matter... gingers don't have souls.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops