Q: Why did you fall of that swing? A: Because I'm fat.

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How do you get an asian out of a rice field? Napalm.

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Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? People cross roads all the time, each for their own personal reasons. Questioning their motives is generally accepted as being unnecessary, as it is a relatively safe action as log as one is careful and heeds the laws of traffic.

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Your mom is such a slut she had sex with your dad on the very first night of their marriage!

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hey what are you eating there? a giant scorpion that tried to rape me.

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Yo mamma is so nice, when she bakes a batch of cookies, there's enough for everybody.

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Knock knock Who's there? A ghost A ghost who?

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What's Black white and red all over? Half a penguin

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What happens when you mix Fluorine, Uranium, Carbon, and Potassium? NaBrO

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Q: What is worse than seven babies in a trash can? A: One baby in seven trash cans. Q: What is worse than one baby in seven trash cans? A: The Holocaust.

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roses are red, violets are blue. Barack Obama says, nice to meet you.

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What is the difference between Charlie Sheen and Michael Jackson? One is dead, one is not.

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2 dogs one jar of peanut butter

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why dont black people go on cruises? there not falling for that one again

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What's black and tasteless? either herpes or a redheads soul

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If one of us goes, all of us go. If we all go, none of us are left out.

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Whats red and eats like dog? A fox.

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then he sits down to enjoy his evening.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you dirty racist.

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What word does almost everyone spell wrong? Wrong.

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What does WTF stand for? Welcome to Facebook!

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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Four rats are smoking in an alley. One rat turns to another and comments, "These are some fine smokes. Where'd ya score these?" The rat holding the pack of Menthols replies, "Off a' Fred." He points to a rotting whale carcass in the road. The other rats are horrified. "How did a whale die in the street?!," they squeak. "He didn't. He died on the beach."

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Knock, knock. Who's there. Death.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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