What did the compliemantry peanuts say to the man? "Nice tie."

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have cancer."

thumb_up thumb_down -18

-How old are you, Dick? -I'm 30 centimeters old

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

a man and a woman walk into a alley. They get mugged the man fights back out of pride and then gets stabbed the woman escapes and then goes to the police the man is then found two days later. *gasp* what a weird dream.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What did one musician say to the other? "We should have gone to college."

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's the difference between a pile of bricks and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a pile of bricks in my basement.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

"Hello?" "Is your refrigerator running??" "Yes..." "Oh. Well then have a nice day."

thumb_up thumb_down -22

kyle dosnt eat dick...

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Knock knock Whos there? FUS ROH DAH

thumb_up thumb_down -24

what happens when a girl poops? she wipes her butt.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

One day, on a train. 30 white, violently, racist people where crowding a black man minding his own business. An asian person walked through and was kicked, stabbed and stomped on until he died.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A friend of yours tells you his version of The Aristocrats. You just wasted about 5-20 minutes of your life.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why is a jewish man so tall? Genetics

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Is this the Krusty Krab? No, this is Patrick

thumb_up thumb_down -26

whoa there

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What do you call a middle eastern man flying a plane?? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What did one German man say to the other? Wo ist das Badezimmer?

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What's better than sex? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Whats worse then this joke? Its punchline.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

If you are my friend like it!

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Narrator: A ghost walks into a church. It is a Jewish church during a Friday night service. Huh. That ghost looks a lost like Hitler. Oh crap, everyone run for your lives! Stranger: GHOSTBUSTERS! Narrator: what, the, heck? Ghostbuster: let's kill some ghosts! Wait a minute. Adolf, is that you? Hitler ghost: John? Ghostbuster: Adolf, Buddy! Narrator:...... Hitler ghost: Hey, John! Wanna grab a drink? Ghostbuster: sure. let's get out of here. Narrator: This joke has officially lost all meaning. I don't even know why I'm submitting it any more! And get this! I AM HALF JEWISH!

thumb_up thumb_down -40

An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

thumb_up thumb_down -42

What do you call 100 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A good start

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops