My neighbor's kid was running around yelling magical spells. I said "Wow, you really want to be like Harry Potter, don't you?". He said "Yes!". So, I killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

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Knock Knock Who's There? The Police The Police Who? Uhm, Ma'am your son just died in a car wreck

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hi michael

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you dirty racist.

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A man with no legs walks into a bar.

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See now that is confident and down to earth, reasonable, and all the etc etc`s, so what would you like me to fill them in with? Joking aside, you are smart, funny, you take a beating (sorry that`s today`s new low point, I have never hit a woman and never will, sure I punched down the GigaLesb when she lifted me up and my spine started making cracking noises, but that does not technically count as a woman). You are sweet, you are cute, you are funny, you are hot hot hot (hattrick see?), and yeah yeah if you want me to prove to people here that we know each other, sure, I met you once like 15 years ago? You kinda adored me, I could not take my eyes of yours (oh yeah, you got adorable eyes sure), and... You got huge breasts (Tits are more like those hanging you know what I mean) Sigh sometimes a boy wonders what he is doing with his life, he falls for the strangest girls... ...AND THEN SAID BOY FINDS HIMSELF BROKEN IN TWINE BY ME!

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Roses are red voilets are blue,you are gay so fuck you,!

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Knock Knock. Who's there? A cannibal. WHAT?! You are about to die and be eaten.

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A black woman sits down in the front of a bus.

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who touched the priests sticky hand? Jake Duncan

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What's the best thing about 27 year old's? There are 20 of them.

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Q. Why did Mary fall down the steps? A. Because she had no legs.

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What do you call a toddler with a gun? Interesting

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Did you hear the one about the kid that farted in class? Cool.

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a blond, brunette, and red head all walk out of a hair salon.

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a

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How did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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Why does batman wear a mask? Because if he didn't every enemy would know who he was, go to his house a brutally murder him.

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Why must you never cross an elephant with a human being? It is impossible anyway.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because it was a hammer.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman...

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Roses are red Violets are blue Refrigerators come in an assortment of colors

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Wade's the father

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What's the difference between a cake and Jews? A cake comes out of the oven.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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