OMG this totally works! Step 1: Hold your breath Step 2: Die

What is the difference between my elbow and my penis? I Cant lick my elbow

What do dogs and cats have in common? They eat dog food, accept for the cat.

What's the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari? One is a sports car and the other is a baby that is not alive.

What's the square root of 69? 8.3

24

How do you get an Irishman out of a bar? You politely ask him to leave.

What did the girl say to the guy raping her? Stop.

Do you want to hear an anti joke? No.

Why couldn't the moose find a good hotel for the night? A moose wouldn't have any currency available and quite frankly, no one would let him in.

Why did the man go to the barber? To get a haircut

What did the teacher say to the student? Get in the closet

Q: Whats worse that 10 dead babies in a trash can? A: 1 dead baby in 10 trash cans.

What do you call something with no legs? A Cripple.

A man is eating a sandwich. He is promptly shot in the face.

buttcrack thumbs up

A man walked into a bar. It hurt.

A duck waddles into a bar. He orders a drink and promtly drinks it vecause he has had a hard day at work.

Why'd the aborted fetus cross the road? 9/11

Hi.

What did timothy say after he went to go golf? - I just went golfing

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wanted to be cool, But I look like you

What's my name? I don't know i was asking u.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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