5

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to a bin lorry

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Q: What do you call a women with 2 bowling pins? A: A women with 2 bowling pins.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken is subject to speculation.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

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Who graduated top of their class, got their degree two years early and lead a very successful life? Not you

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What did the Lumberjack say before cutting down the tree? Nothing, it's his job.

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roses are red violets are blue oranges are......

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What's round and red? A red and round solid.

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conrad profit

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What did Death say to Life? "Look, I respect that you waited till after I broke up with Sandy to ask her out, but it's still a little akward for me, so although there are no hard feelings, it's probably better if we keep our distance from each other for awhile."

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse replies "My wife just died from pancreatic cancer."

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Whats the difference between a walnut and a baby ? Ones fun to hit with a hammer and the other is a walnut

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What is brown and sticky? The substance used to line your stomach when getting your stomach pumped.

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Q: Where did Bethany hide the dead baby? A: In the trash can

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Why did the bus drop a boy holding ice cream? Its driver was not paying full attention on the road and was sentenced 15 years for manslaughter.

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Yo mama's so fat that she took a look at her life and realized she wanted a change so she joined a dieting group and started eating better and exercising more and she got down to her goal weight and now looks and feels better than ever it's very inspirational, good for her.

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When life gives you aids, make aids-aid.

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Two guys walk into the woods an saw a naked lady.One guys ran away. When his friend met up with him he ask why did u run away. He siad "my mom said if i a naked lady that i would turn to stone and i felt myself getting hard."

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How many dislikes can this get?

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How do you stop 5 black guys from raping a girl? You call the proper authorities. Don't try to be a hero.

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Hippopatomous!

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"You know what my motto in life is?" "No" "Oh, that's a shame."

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What did one baby say to the other? Nothing, they're both dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops