Roses are red, Violets are blue, My van is coming, I'm gonna get you!

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What do Chinese people call Chinese food? Food.

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A guy walks into a bar. The universe instantly shatters around him under the weight of infinite potential punchlines. He tumbles through the void amongst the shards of his broken reality. This is the worst joke ever.

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Two rocks are in the playground. Nothing happens, because rocks are not sentient beings and are thus incapable of producing any sort of activity on their own.

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Whats a box full of sand? a sandsquare

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Why did the chicken cross the road? he wanted to.

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daniel thinks 30 rock is funny

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Jacob went onto anti-jokes cause Brock told him to and Jacobs his bitch.

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Your mamma is so fat that she went on a diet.

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Why was Bill in jail? He stabbed 17 black people because they didn't deserve welfare checks.

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what is the difference between babies and trampolines? you take your shoes off when jumping on a trampoline

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A guy walks into a bar. He orders a coke. The bartender looks at the gentlemen with a little smile and says "Just a coke?"

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fack me!

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what did eminem say to dr.dre? nothing u idoits dr.dres dead he is locked in my basement

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So horse walk into a bar. The barkeep says "Look horse. You cant be in Here. You're too big and you're going to hurt someone....Its just not gonna work out."

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What is the difference between a blonde and a Mexican? Their hair color.

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Q: What did the black man say to his Ex wife after she placed a restraining order on him? A: nothing, he was no longer allowed contact with her of any kind and thus could not converse with her

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why was your family so sad? because you died due to your uncle's son's cousin urinating all over you as a baby causing you to sting yourself continually. did i mention you were born as a scorpion while your family members were all human beings making them neglect and throw you away in their trash when you would always climb out. your family secretly hid affection for you. back to the beginning. when you died everyone in the whole world except bill cosby got cancer at the exact moment you died, but years later (because bill cosby is immortal), he got down syndrome after everyone who was alive during your death died. that is why he goes doo dop bip babbity today.

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A blond, a brunette, and redhead are trapped on an island. They all try to swim across shark infested waters to the mainland. While they're swimming, the blond turns to the redhead and says, "This water is mildly cold." The redhead replies "Yeah."

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Never tell Alzheimer's jokes to old people. They will not remember them.

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What’s black and white and red all over? A zebra in a meat grinder

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hey guys check out my cool youtube video at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ivQ_bezJjK0

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Jason Connor.

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A Guy walks into a bar Ouch

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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