A turkey and a ham walk into a room. The ham says to the turkey "You're a turkey." The turkey in response says, "Yeah, well you're a ham!" They both then get their heads chopped off, as the room they were in was a slaughterhouse.

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What has wheels and flies? An Airplane

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Would you like a better house, car, spouse, and a better life all together? No, no thanks.

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hello

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there is no such thing as a dumb blonde. cant you tell? I'm a blonde... skipping school.

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[] i have read and agree to the terms of service Nope

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patty was in sunday school, the teacher asked her "patty who created the universe?" john sliped into the seat next to her and jabbed her with a pen "LORD ALMIGHTY" the teacher said' good patty now who gave himself for us? john again jabbed her with a pin "JESUS CHRIST" "that very good patty now what did mary say to joseph after they had their 23 child?" john jabbed her " IF YOU STICK THAT DAMN THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME ILL BREAK IT IN HALF!!!" the teacher fainted

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A white man and woman are married and the wife becomes pregnant. However, the wife has been having an affair with an African American man. The baby turns out to be white and so the woman was very fortunate or else the husband would have figured it out for sure.

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What do Jews, Muslims and Blacks have in common? They are all valuable members of the community and should be treated no differently from anyone else

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Roses are red Violets are blue Refrigerators come in an assortment of colors

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What is the biggest lie in the universe? "I have read and agree to the Terms of Service"

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Why are these jokes so funny? Because they're NOT!

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who touched the priests sticky hand? Jake Duncan

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A man walks into a bar and sees a jar filled with money. He asks the bartender, "What`s all this money for?" The bartender replies, "It`s Breast Cancer Awareness month and we are collecting donations." The man puts in $5, and continues on with his night.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. No, the Holocaust never happened, you're an idiot.

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Why did the Koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second Koala fall out the tree? Hit by the first Koala. Why did the third Koala fall out the tree? Peer pressure

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what did the mexicans name their daughter? nothing. they were deported before they had a chance

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What do you call a shattered lightbulb? A hazard that should be taken very seriously.

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How did Muhammed Ali get into Professional Boxing? With a lot of hard work and dedication.

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You know what you can do with your offer to 'help'? Await another opportunity please I appreciate it much.

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What do you call a dog with three legs, is blind, and has terminal cancer? UnLucky

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead.

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knock knock... whose there? I don't know why don't you open it and find out dumb ass... Gosh people and their common sense these days!!

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How do you confuse a person from France? By screaming in english at the sky while pionting at him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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