How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

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Roses are red Violets are blue your mum went to the loo and out came you

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What did the widow get for her birthday? Nothing from her husband.

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The daring man said "here goes nothing." And nothing happened. -Tag

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The police, we have several warrants for your arrest.

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How do you make someone feel stupid? You throw a smart person at them

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Why did a lady get in a car crash? Because woman don't drive, they stay in the kitchen!

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What do you call a black man? Jamal

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3 dogs, a blue dog, a yellow dog, and a red dog. The owner was a man named Jeff. Now the blue dog was always sad so Jeff named him blue. The yellow dog was always scared so Jeff named him yellow. Now the red dog he was red because he had red fur, so Jeff named him red. One day when Jeff was reading his newspaper, he accidentally hit his coffee and it fell on the floor. Question: What did Jeff do? I don't know.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? 3

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Roses are black. Violets are grey. I'm a dog...

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How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie into in!

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What did the black man say to the policeman? "Take it easy."

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your father died

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why are they called the melbourne storms? Because you turn 360 degrees and walk away

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing finding a worm in an apple is disgusting because worms are disgusting creature that shouldn't live in an apple

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what do you get when you combine a cat and a dog? nothing since it is impossible to combine a cat and a dog

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roses are red violets are blue i dont give a damn how bout you

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Farts smell bad!

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Moral Man Solid V: The Pain Phantom.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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What do video games and school have in common? Nothing, nobody likes school

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What's the difference between a Ginger and a Brick? A ginger is a living organism.

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If an atom bomb falls in a town, does it make a sound? Not to most people, as they would be killed in a massive catastrophe that will be etched into their ancestors minds for years to come, not to mention radiation poisoning and deformation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops