What do you do when a blonde throws a hand grenade at you? Run.

Moral Man Solid V: The Pain Phantom.

why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms. knock knock. who's there? well, its not suzie.

roses are red violets are blue i dont give a damn how bout you

A seal walks into a club.

What did the the Priest do to the young alter boy? Blessed Him

A black guy WALKS out of prison.

Your mother is so fat that she got diabetes and later died of an unrelated illness.

If she is under the age of 18 years old and is identified by your state as a minor, shes too young for you bro.

Whats worse then failing ur English test? Getting hit by a train

What's the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes back from camp.

What's the difference between George Washington and Wiz Khalifa? George Washington died many years ago.

Penis in a butthole. Consentual Sex.

Three kids are standing on a corner. They have red hair, blue hair, and green hair respectively. A man asks the kid with red hair "How did you get your hair red?" The kid replies, "I dyed it." The man then asks the kid with blue hair, "How did you get your hair blue?" The kid replies, "I dyed it." The man finally asks the kid with green hair, "How did you get your hair green?" The kid wipes his hand across his nose, gathering green slime and replies, "I dyed it."

Is this the Krusty Krab? No, the Krusty Krab is a fictional place, and therefore does not exist.

How many Jews can fit in a VW Beetle? 2 in the front, 3 in the back, and maybe one in the trunk, but that wouldn't be very comfortable.

Ding dong... Knocking hurts.

-What do you call the brown spots in your yard? Dog shit.

How do you get an Irishman out of a bar? You politely ask him to leave.

Its true, he didnt write that!!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Although this is a highly improbable scenario, one would assume that, being a chicken, it did not have much of an intuitive idea as to what to do while it was stray for whatever reason in an urbanized area. Considering chickens do not harbor nearly as much of a mental capacity as it would require to even comprehend the concept of a "road" and is impervious to the idea of oncoming traffic and such, the fact that it happened to be crossing the road was in fact not even recognized by the chicken. For this reasons I deem this question unanswerable.

Why do you go to a black mans yardsale? To buy something cheap. Why don't you hit a black guy on a bike? Because it is illegal.

a rabbi,a priest and minister didn't walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

(Pretend that your adopted, and no one loves you) Knock Knock Who's there? Not your parents.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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