Two cows were on a field, one cow say "moo", the other... didn't say anything because it wasn't a cow

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Three soldiers, one Japanese, one American, and one Italian were stuck in a desert. How did they escape? A rescue squad of thirty trained troops came down in a helicopter and brought them each to their respective homes except the Italian who was actually a Mafia boss so they put him in prison.

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Whats worse than swinging a dead baby by a rope? Stopping it with a shovel.

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Your so stupid, that your stupid.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? I don't know.

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What do you call a shattered lightbulb? A hazard that should be taken very seriously.

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Blind people can't read this.

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Bob: why didthe chicken cross the road? Tom: why? Bob: to get to your house Knock knock Tom: whos their Bob: the chicken

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What do you call a dog with three legs, is blind, and has terminal cancer? UnLucky

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead.

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A black guy, an asian guy, and a white guy jump off a cliff, who lands first? Well, newton's first law states that every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. So it depends on who weighs the most.

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yo mama so fat that the doctor asked for her weight not her phone number!

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A man named Cecil walks into a bar. He then orders a drink.

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Your Momma's So fat, that she is quite unhealthy, and she should stop spending her life savings at fast food restaurants. Probably should stop drinking pop as well.

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What's green and goes 100 miles an hour? a green racing car

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Boy: Dad, come here I need to tell you something. Dad: What? Boy: My name is Jeff. Dad: *Grabs shotgun* " I've had with that damn term"

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What happened when your mom closed the blinds? You.

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A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walks briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

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what do you call three kkk guys in your house ghost busters

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How is a white orphan like a black baby? Neither are sure who their parents are :(

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What did the man do when he walked into the gym? Died of a brain aneurysm.

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Ask me if i am a tree are you a tree? no

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Halo < COD

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Why does no one we talk about Nagasaki, they got bombed too...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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