Q:What did the robot say to the boy? A:Nothing the robot malfunctioned and started choking the boy, despite the towns best efforts they could not release the death grip on the boys throat, after the robot was done choking the boy it exploded killing 99% of the population in a 5 mile radius.

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How do you make someone feel stupid? You throw a smart person at them

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Why did the old man wander into the highway? He hated his life.

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What has two heads and one body Conjoined twins

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This isn't a joke, but I'm going to ruin the fun of this site by clicking the thumbs up until I one day get onto the first page.

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What did the girl say to the guy raping her? Stop.

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Chuck Norris can get a nuke in Black Ops.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? 3

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

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What did the black man say to the policeman? "Take it easy."

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How do you get a clown off a swing? You hit him with an axe How can you release your anger at somebody? Kill them How do you stop a bus? Throw small children at it

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A man walked into a bar, was surprised to find his wife with another man, and had a heart attack.

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Why did the car stop. someone threw a cow at it.

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why are they called the melbourne storms? Because you turn 360 degrees and walk away

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your father died

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what do you get when you combine a cat and a dog? nothing since it is impossible to combine a cat and a dog

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What do you call a kid with a peg leg and an eye patch? Names

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i love huge wieners.

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Why couldn't the moose find a good hotel for the night? A moose wouldn't have any currency available and quite frankly, no one would let him in.

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A Nazi and a Communist walk into a bar. 10 million Slavs die.

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Q: How many light bulbs does it take to change a blonde? A: One, if she tries to swallow it.

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What's the difference between a Ginger and a Brick? A ginger is a living organism.

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What do video games and school have in common? Nothing, nobody likes school

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A small boy called peter got stuck up a tree, a man walks past and said "how did you get up there?" peter replies "i fell"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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