If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

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What do you feel when you kill a terrorist? Recoil -USMC

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7>6

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Why did the priest kill his family? Preists can't marry, therefore have not families.

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A black man enters a bar. The bartender approaches him, and asks "who will it be?" The black man pulls out a gun and robs the bar, he is then arrested ten days later.

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69

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What's red and on fire? My crotch

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LIE

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What did the girl say to her tits? I wanna suck u.

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Why did the little girl cry when the x-ray showed her mom had a tumor? It was benign.

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After waking up at the break of dawn, a man saw his dogs food dish was empty. In slight excitement for his dog to finally eat after his dish being empty all night, he called his dog in from outside, expecting him to go straight to his food dish like always. The dog walked by without noticing.

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So a Nazi walks into a bar full of jews, he ordered a drink and mumbled slures to himself.

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What do you get when you mix Fruit and Flys? Fries... or Flutes, depending on how many Flys your add.

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A wise man once said, "Your life is your habits." So simple yet so true. My habits include: Breathing, having my heart beat, producing brain waves, and other regulatory bodily processes.

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Q: what happens when you eat all the potatoes A: there all gone

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How can you tell your woman is cheating on you? When you witness her having sexual relations with another man that she is clearly enjoying.

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q: whys this website gay a: kids like jaali,pawgee, and mutt

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What did Steegers say when he lost his TARDIS? "The niggers stole it again!"

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why did the woman cross the road? to get to her full time job as a lawyer.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To meet with his great grandmother who got rushed to hospital due to having an epileptical seizure and is in life threatning conditions.

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Why didn't the lobster share his treasure? Because he did not possess the cranial capacity to understand the concept of ownership; thus, he did not consider the treasure his

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two jews walk into a bar and were served properly

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Don't look! I'm naked! No, seriously! I'm naked!

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what do you call a retarded italian Niko

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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