What did the cop do when he saw two Mexicans buying coke? Warned them of the health risks of drinking carbonated soft drinks.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, Others dont

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c+t+c?

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i'm not gay

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Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage

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Yo momma so thin, she admitted herself into an in-patient counseling center for anorexic and bulimic patients.

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What has two thumbs and is very pale? A dead baby.

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God bless America, and no where else.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender asks the rabbi "why the long face?" The rabbi says "to get to the other side." Seeing the puzzled look on the bartender's face, the priest says, "orange you glad he didn't say banana?"

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Why did I put the baby into the blender feet first? So I could see its facial expression

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W.N.B.A.

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A schizophrenic man walks into a bar. He has split personalities and does not realize that he has murdered his family.

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What did the prostitute eat for lunch? Nothing because she was too busy performing oral sex for money.

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While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Elephants cant jump Neither can amputees

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What's the difference between Micheal Phelps and Adolf Hitler. Michael Phelps is an Olympic swimmer who has won many gold medals in the 2008 Olympics in swimming races and is considered to be one of the greatest swimmers ever. Adolf Hitler was a terrible man who was the leader of the Nazi party during the World Wars. He ordered to kill eight million Jews, causing what is called the Holocaust. He is considered one of the worst men in human history. Other immature people would say Micheal Phelps can finish races.

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Your mother is so black...because she recently suffered a horrible accident with fire and has irreparable skin damage.

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Why did the man die from drinking the water? It wasn't water, it was acid.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An Astronaut.

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Oh my God! A talking dog!

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A pussy walks into a bar and orders a drink, the bar keeper asks " why are you such a pussy!" The pussy then says, "it's not my fault I'm a cat!" before getting run over

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roses are red facebook is blue no mutual friends who the heck are you

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If you were a Transformer, you would be Optimus Fine.

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Black People.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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