What do you call a cow in the grass... A cow in the grass... Dumbas*

Do you know what will hurt? Getting hurt.

What did the Asian bookkeeper say to the Jewish dog? I love you

Why did the chicken cross the road? Unfortunately there are billions of chickens in the world and based on the question it is not possible to determine which specific chicken is being referred to. Even if we were able to ascertain this knowledge it would be unlikely that we could determine its purpose, as chickens don't usually make decisions based on logical thought.

Three surfers paddle out into the surf. They had a pretty good time, except one of them got a shit ton of water up his nose.

What did the Lumberjack say before cutting down the tree? Nothing, it's his job.

(speaking to an orphan) knock, knock who's there not your parents

One time Chuck Norris cried. He felt slightly better after the experience, but, unfortunately, his grandmother still died of cancer.

Video Games

Why can't Sean slam dunk cos he has no arms -•#21

why was the boy mad at school? something probably upset him.

What three letters alter boys into men and girls into women? The letter containing their bank card, the letter containing their national insurance card and the letter accepting them into a job or higher education placement.

What do you call a fish with no "eyes" Dead

2 dogs one jar of peanut butter

Thomas the Tank Engine could see Express up ahead on the tracks! His driver shut off steam and applied his brakes. Ahead of him Gordon groaned "Ohhhhh stop your train! Stop your train! His driver and fireman jumped out quickly. Thomas tried his very hardest and eventually found himself slowing down. But there wasn't enough time and Thomas smashed right into the express. Seven people were killed and Thomas himself was smashed to pieces.

Enchilada

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he fell off a cliff

A Black man, a Mexican, and a Midget, get in a car. They drive to the county fair and get snow cones and have a really fun time.

What did the Anti-Semitic man say to the Jewish man beside him? Hello.

Yo momma so ugly that she had self esteem issues and committed suicide, making her husband extremely depressed.

Q: Why did sally fall off the swing? A: She got hit in the face with an axe

Guns don't kill people. Dangerous minorities do.

what do you call 6 black guys hung in a tree? a arazona wind chime

Curiosity killed the cat and was sentenced to prison for animal abuse.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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