why was your family so sad? because you died due to your uncle's son's cousin urinating all over you as a baby causing you to sting yourself continually. did i mention you were born as a scorpion while your family members were all human beings making them neglect and throw you away in their trash when you would always climb out. your family secretly hid affection for you. back to the beginning. when you died everyone in the whole world except bill cosby got cancer at the exact moment you died, but years later (because bill cosby is immortal), he got down syndrome after everyone who was alive during your death died. that is why he goes doo dop bip babbity today.

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Nobody doesn't like Sarah Lee. There are no humans, at all, anywhere in the world, who do not like Sarah Lee. None. Not even one. They do not exist in reality. Everyone likes Sarah Lee. Everyone.

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What did the cancer patient do during Willow Smith's "Whip My Hair"? -Nothing.

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How did the girl die? 25.

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What’s black and white and red all over? A zebra in a meat grinder

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How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie into in!

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hey guys check out my cool youtube video at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ivQ_bezJjK0

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You smell like shit

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Guess how old my lil bro is...Well your wrong cause he's dead.

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Your mama so fat she is physically larger than other people.

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Knock Knock Who's there? A Kid With ADD A Kid With AD- Oh Look! A Squirrel!

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fack me!

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Man is hit by a falling tree his friend immediately responds "Got Wood" the man is now paraplegic

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Two men walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

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uhh i dont feel like writing a joke

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LOL May Wong

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A man walks into a bar. Another man walks into a bar.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE

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how many babies does it take to screw in a light bulb? there are no babies they are all dead in my garage

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Why did i drink 4 sodas? Because i was thirsty

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What's worse than your family dying in a fire? Nothing, that really sucks.

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What did the goat say to the other goat? They are poorly evolved animals and incable of speaking.

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What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a women. Statutory rape.

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A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty, He said 'No'. She asked him if he would want to be with her forever. He said 'no'. She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, Once again, he replied 'no'. She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and said.. 'Asking emotionally charged hypothetical questions that are completely irrelevant to the prior conversation is known as fishing for compliments. Except, your tears seem to reflect a more serious inner emotional neediness. I suggest you seek a psychologist.'

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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