why do birds fly away when you go near them? incase your black

What kind of coins to you find at the bottom of the ocean? Wet coins.

What is the square root of 69? 8.30662386

what colour is a frog green you idiot

I hate it when sentences don't end the way you expect them potato.

What did the cab driver say to the duck who wanted a ride in the cab? Get out of the cab.

What did the white man say to the muslim? Hi

Q. How do you break into a store that's closed? A. You walk in, I was lying about it being closed.

What's worse than finding your dad's wedding ring while fingering your sister ? 3 bee stings.

Two men walked into a bar. The third transformed into a duck and flew away.

How do you determine the population of mexico? Send out a census every 4 years.

What's worse than missing Taco Tuesday? Your whole family dying in a car crash.

Why couldn't the pirate boy see the movie? He was blind.

The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

Whats cooler than cool? Ice Cold.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

why did the baby bird fall out of the nest? while the mother bird was away a cat knocked over the nest. needless to say the baby bird died.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Thats where the slaughterhouse is.

What's funnier than Carrot Top and Dane Cook combined? Almost anything.

What is a man with no arms and no legs on a pile of leaves? A quadriplegic who enjoys the fall.

What is the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench is an inanimate object whereas a black man is a human being with rights.

Q: Why was six afraid of seven? A: Because of Kevin Spacey's chilling performance.

There was a homeless man living all by his lonesome on a street corner, desperately begging for money. Suddenly, a car comes to a screeching halt and out of the window flies a thin, square piece of plastic. The hobo successfully catches it in both hands. "Whats dis?" he says, "What da hick can I do wid a stinkin wada plastic?" he says, failing to realizing the significance of the thin square of plastic, for he is but a hobo and has been out of touch with reality for quite some time. After some time, he gains back his common sense, "Aha!" he shouts, "it is but a condom!" A few days pass, the man wondering alone in search for a way to make use of his prized, plastic square. He encounters a beautiful female hobo (at least he thinks she is) and they make love. So not only does the hobo make use of the silly condom (which expired-he just doesn't know) he get's laid and keeps warm in the brutal winter weather by getting cozy with the hobo chick. There are some pros in being a hobo, you know. After a month, both hobos make the faithful decision to join their cardboard boxes together, thus creating a new home where they live happily ever after <3

a drumset fell off a clif. Badoom ch.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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