I know Mandarin, He's a good friend of mine

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sarah taylor

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The Gestapo.

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What do you get when you cross a zombie with a beer? Nothing because zombies are just another subject dealing with the occult.

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knock, knock. come in.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had a serious alcohol problem that gave him violent tendencies.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? A bike that his father paid for with the salary he made as an accountant at a local bank.

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I don't do cocaine I just like the smell

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Three men are walking on a beach when they find a lamp. They rub it, and a genie comes out. It tells them that they each get one wish, and to choose wisely. They each decide to discuss what to wish for with their wives. Their wives take them to a local hospital, where they receive treatment for hallucinations.

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Humpdy dumpty sat on a wall and enjoyed his day off

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Once upon a time there were seven dwarfs. They were named Steven, Jason, John, Peter and Alfred.

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Do you know what the cop said to the black guy? Your free to go

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? It shouldn't take more than one person to do this task, regardless of hair color.

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So, I was eating out this girl Until I tasted something like horse semen. So I looked up at her and said; " Ah grandma, so that's how you died ! ".

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Yo mamas so fat

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Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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An Irishman walks out of a bar...

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women playing football?

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why did the child go to school? Because he wants to succeed in life

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Why did the black man buy a watermelon? To eat it of course

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What do you call someone who can't lose? Charlie Sheen

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What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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Why... ...did the chicken cross the road?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops