One time i ate a hamberger than an hour later i sneezed but i dont think it had anything to do with the hamberger.

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What did the baby with Downs syndrome say to the baby with cancer? Nothing, baby's can't talk

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Why was the Asian women crossing 8 lanes of traffic with no blinker? Poor chink had a seizure.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Suzie. How is that even possible?

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Have you seen Helen Keller's back porch? Neither did she.

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Q.) How do you fit a baby into a bowl? A.) With a blender! Q.) How do you get it out? A.) With Tostitos! -Sebastian and Chris (aka 100 and Zelot) (we did not make this joke, we just had to share it)

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Dislike if you are gay (watch how many dislikes this joke gets :P)

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no

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Two tubes of ice cream are sitting in a freezer, one turns to the other and says "its bloody freezing in here" God then corrects this apparent mistake in the combined laws of physics and biology

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Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas ? Because sadly his father is an alcoholic and cant support him nor his family.

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A king's son's birthday came one day and the king asked what he wanted. "You can have anything in the world son." He would say. The prince answered,"Oh i'll have some purple ping pong balls." So for his birthday he got a rollar costar, a new car, a water park, a castle, and of corse some purple ping pong balls. The same answer went out of his mouth for three years. One day the prince was driving in his car, and he got into a terrible car accadent. And while he was in the ER and saying his last words, his father asked,"Son, before you die, i must know, why did you want purple ping pong balls for your all of those birthdays?" And the prince said,"Well I wanted them because-" and then he died.

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Snooki want smoosh smoosh

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A: Knock knock (pause) A: Knock knock (pause) A: Knock knock B: (frustrated), I thought we had that damn thing fixed!!!

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Hey, you want to hear an anti-joke? yeah, sure. .....well, too bad!

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A Jew walks into a bar. He sits down for about half an hour, enjoys some drinks and calls a taxi to take him home.

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Whats worse than 10 dead babies In a tub 10 and 1/2

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What did the three bears say when rhey discovered goldilocks? Nothing. They mauled her to death.

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roses are red, violets? are blue, Im not good at poems, tits

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What's green and has wheels? A bus. I lied about the green.

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Q:What did the robot say to the boy? A:Nothing the robot malfunctioned and started choking the boy, despite the towns best efforts they could not release the death grip on the boys throat, after the robot was done choking the boy it exploded killing 99% of the population in a 5 mile radius.

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Why did the homeless man cross the road? The soup kitchen has just reopened after months of rebuilding from a fire. He was very hungry.

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roses are red violets are blue i have deep vein thrombosis .... perpendicular albatross

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How do you get an Irishman out of a bar? You politely ask him to leave.

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how do u make a sausage roll push it down a hill

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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