Two 50 year old men walk into eachother on the street. one was born in a hobo shack and another was born in a mansion. what did the rich one say to the poor one? Hi, whats your name?

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What's the difference between an apple and an orange? 87

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What is blue and smells like red paint, Blue Paint

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What did George Washington say to his men before they crossed the Delaware? Get in the boat.

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Q:What did I get for Christmas? A:You, put on this leash.

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Your mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late, great surrealist artist Salvatore Dali mistook them for clocks.

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whats beter than a dead pile of babies? the alive one that has to eat its way out

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whats funny? laughing at people when they die a slow and painful death.

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what did batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile "robin, get in the batmobile"

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Homework.

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whats da difference between a black people and grass. there both black except for the grass.

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Three people are stranded on an island. They are captured by a tribe of cannibal natives. The natives say " find 10 fruits of the same kind and bring them back" The first guy comes back with apples The natives say " shove them up your buttox without showing any sign of emotion" The firs guy gets to the second apple and then woos in pain the natives kill him The second guy comes back with blue berries he gets to the ninth berry and laughs. The natives kill him. The two guys are in heaven. The fist guy says " you could've survived why did you laugh?" the second guy replies," I saw the third guy coming back with pineapples"

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I little 3 year old girl said to her dog "You're my best friend in the whole world" AND THEN THE DOG DIED!

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Why does a snake have eyes? To see!

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A Boy went up to his dad and told him he was hungry. His dad then beat him to death.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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How do you spell Madeleine Mccann? I A N

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How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? Probably just one.

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What do you call a mouse that sings? Justin Bieber

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Why are you reading anti-jokes? ... why are you looking at me like that? I asked you a question, idiot.

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Women's Rights.

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I used to be an inventor, but I had other ideas.

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Osama Bin Laden and a monk walk into a bar. Mistaken Identity. It was the Dalai Lama, Osama is dead.

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Q: How do you stop a Mexican tank? A: Ask politely.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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