Why did the girl fall off the swing? She didnt have arms

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Q:What did the robot say to the boy? A:Nothing the robot malfunctioned and started choking the boy, despite the towns best efforts they could not release the death grip on the boys throat, after the robot was done choking the boy it exploded killing 99% of the population in a 5 mile radius.

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Why did the homeless man cross the road? The soup kitchen has just reopened after months of rebuilding from a fire. He was very hungry.

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What's green and has wheels? A bus. I lied about the green.

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Hey, you want to hear an anti-joke? yeah, sure. .....well, too bad!

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Snooki want smoosh smoosh

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roses are red violets are blue i have deep vein thrombosis .... perpendicular albatross

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How do you get an Irishman out of a bar? You politely ask him to leave.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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how do u make a sausage roll push it down a hill

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what's better to a kid than ice cream from an ice cream truck? when you realize the driver was at your house 3 days ago notifying you that he is a convicted pedophile.

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I'd type a joke about dicks but it's too long.

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Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar.... Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece? Man 1: Were the hell did you come from? Homo-sexual Panda: My mother's uterus same as you, retard.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? A bike that his father paid for with the salary he made as an accountant at a local bank.

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What's the main reason for divorce? Marriage.

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Dead babies and disabled kids. Jews, mexicans and black people. Hitler and prostitutes. Sex sex sex sex sex.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food?? Neither have they...

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Why did the baby start crying? Its mom slapped it in the face, causing permanent brain damage that would haunt it throughout its life.

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What ruined the little boy's day? He drowned.

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What's worse than finding an apple in your wo- wait, what?!

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What's worse than 1000 babies tied to a tree? 1 baby tied to 1000 trees.

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only downer about having sex in the dark is........................ when u look out window and guy u thought u were sleeping with waving and laugh

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What did the virulent Homophobe do during the PRIDE national day of silence? He talked

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whats blue and can be seen in the sky? the sky.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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