Why was Jimmy so upset? Because both of his parents died.

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How do you make a little girl cry twice? You finish on her teddy bear.

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I just flew in from New York and boy are my arms tired. I was jerking off during the entire plane ride.

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Why was Veronica lying on the sidewalk? She was just in a drive-by shooting.

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what do you call three kkk guys in your house ghost busters

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What do you call Santa's helpers? Chinese factory workers, who live in impoverished conditions, work up to 16 hours a day, earning slave wages. God damn you, Steve Jobs and Mattel.

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How is a white orphan like a black baby? Neither are sure who their parents are :(

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what's big fat and hairy yo mamma

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Q.Whats funny about death A.You die

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A mama cow was sitting in the barn with her 3 babies. The first baby cow goes "Mom, why did you name me Daisy?" "Because a Daisy landed on your head when you were born" The second calf goes "Mom, why did you name me Rose?" "Because a Rose petal landed on your head when you where born." The third calf says "Aasdfghoiuytfghjkuiy" The mom replies "Shut up brick"

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Halo < COD

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Why did the womens basketball team beat the mens? the men were locked in a refrigerator

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Who's gay and has buttsex? Dan.

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Why does no one we talk about Nagasaki, they got bombed too...

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Hitler: I said PASS THE JUICE! not GAS THE JEWS!

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That awkward moment when the moment is awkward.

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Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

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Two cougars are at a nightclub. Suddenly, they attack and 8 patrons are mauled to death.

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Yo' Mama so nice that she donated a kidney and saved a life

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What did the priest say to the rabbi? "Hey Joe, how's the family?"

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What did the white guy say to the black guy wearing a black T-shirt? That's a very nice shirt.

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Women's Sports

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That didn't hurt.

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Why did Riley cross the road? A: I lied he started to then proceeded to get hit by a bus filled with children causing them all to be scarred for life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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